I’m about to admit something, and I’m not really sure if I should. I mean, it’s probably a little bit scary to talk about. And it might not win me any friends. It all goes back to when I decided to make the leap and left my job to stay at home with Nugget during the days. I knew as soon as I did it that I was making the right decision, but I knew that there would be difficult times, and that the job I was taking was often thankless, and more difficult than people give it credit for being.
All that said, for the first time in recent history, I feel more rested and relaxed than I have in a long time.
I’m sure that part of this is tied to the fact that Nugget is still not really mobile on her own. Crawling just doesn’t look like it’s going to happen (she doesn’t seem all that keen on getting her booty off the ground for this). Walking is still a little ways off, but she is starting to enjoy standing a lot more often, so who knows how long it’ll be before she takes off on her own. So, for the most part, I’ve got a very happy, bouncy baby girl who generally stays in the same general area she’s put down. She’s also an incredibly good sleeper (even if she doesn’t choose to fall asleep until after 9 at night, a trait that she clearly inherited from her dad), so that means that I’m generally getting the sleep I need during the hours my body wants to get it.
Our days are currently relatively plan-free, as well. That will change, as we’ll spend time outside when it gets warmer, and there will be playdates and activities and all sorts of things to occupy (and challenge) her mind. In the meantime, it means that Nugget and I get to just kind of hang-out and be low-key. There’s time spent playing with her toys, reading books, and just all around cuddling. It’s fantastic, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
I know that, stereotypically, the stay-at-home parent is supposed to be frazzled, unsure of themselves, with stringy, dirty hair, and a constant hunger gnawing at them because they don’t have time to get a quick sandwich. And I might find myself there eventually. Right now, though, this time being spent with her has rewarded me in so many incredible ways, and the way that I’ve literally felt stress and worry slip away has been truly wonderful.
Yes, there are different worries (for example, I spend a fair amount of time worrying that she’s trying to figure out how to twist her ankle, or worrying that I’m not going to clean up her sneezes fast enough), but they are worries that I’ve gladly taken on, and they really feel selfless. I still get my time to be an adult and not be 100% responsible for her, which is also a nice refresher, but, overall, the time I spend with Nugget every day just makes me realize how truly lucky I am that I got to make this adjustment.
And hey, if it wasn’t working out, it’s only a few years before she’s off at school. Just think about how many daytime talk shows I’ll be able to watch then.